Jennifer (noirem) wrote,

GOP, abortion, rape

If you have no idea what I'm talking about read this first

I have tried to put into words my thoughts and feelings on the matter and I can't. I can tell you that I want to cry, that I want to throw up, that I am ashamed, and furious, but that's just surface chatter. I lean strongly towards pro-life, but I think the right to have one is just that - a right. I can talk about the abortion side of it (and I will) but the rape side escapes my eloquence. The damage to our society by making rape harder to prosecute, easier to ignore, easier to continence when it is already so amazingly difficult, ignored, and countenanced... I look at countries and societies where women have no rights and think about everything I wish they had - education, choices, rights, equality - but how can I give these things to someone else when I don't have all of them myself? And they want to make it worse? I don't have the words for this argument. I've seen statistics and figures, looked at websites and read books, heard lectures and life stories. I don't have them all to hand or the inclination to find them because either you believe that things like Male Privilege and Rape Culture exist or you don't and nothing I say, do, or show you will change your mind.

Instead I'm going to talk about abortion. I think we should all make it a life goal to reduce the need for abortions. The GOP is merely trying to reduce their occurrence.

If you want to reduce abortions, you have to reduce unwanted pregnancies. Hand out birth control like it's candy. I'm not a "put BC in the water" kinda girl, but I think everyone needs to be in control of their own reproduction. "Just say no" doesn't work. We need education and contraceptives. Part of the problem is that the onus is on women and yet being perceived as sexually active is still hugely taboo. Boys will be boys but girls have to keep their knees together. If you want to reduce the number of abortions, you have to fight this. You have to decide that it's more important to be safe than to hold women to an unachievable model of perfection.

Accidents happen. 99.9% effective means one woman in 1000 is going to get pregnant. Now what? If you don't want her to have an abortion you have to make sure she can afford to be pregnant - this is social as well as financial. Again, you need to fight the stigma: a woman who is afraid of being "found out" will want an abortion. Being pregnant, giving birth, having a baby - it's really expensive! If you want to prevent women from having abortions, you have to cover those costs: free pre-natal care, free delivery, free post-natal.

She had her baby! yay! um, now what? Diapers cost money. We have marriage incentives (which don't work) - why don't we have parent incentives? whether you're married or not, if we as a society have decided that raising the next generation is important, then we have to support this endeavour. Jobs and schooling with flexible hours, state-funded day-care - we have to provide these things for everyone.

And let's not forget adoption. There are so many people out there who would love to have a child of their own and can't and there are also people who don't want to add to the population for one reason or another but would still like a child. Adopting parents need better protections. If the birth mother changes her mind she can take the child back. How is that in the child's best interest? You should have to prove that the adoptive parents are unfit. I think birth mothers should have rights, based on an open adoption model, but not more rights than the parents - certainly not more rights than the child: a right to grow up in a stable environment.

Cut down the number of unwanted pregnancies, cut down economic dis-incentives for being pregnant, cut down the costs and inconveniences associated with raising a child, let people who are in a position to raise a child help those who aren't safely, and above all, stop blaming women for failing to live up to an impossible standard.

These are ideas off the top of my head. I'm sure there are flaws in my reasoning. But somewhere in this criminally misguided effort there is a worthy goal, if only people are willing to look beyond the blame game, the short term sop, and plan long term solutions.

Comments are not screened (for "friends"), but keep in mind this is my sandbox and you are a guest - behave accordingly.
Tags: abortion, politics, rape
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